Today while I looked at Steven’s (UNTIL I BECAME) previous blog posts, I thought about the event at Minling Pan Studio and pondered over the wonderful clothes that I get to look at and/or try on at Moda L Boutique. Then I thought about my own style and about the clothes that I like to wear. What is my style?
“Fashion is bought, style is what you have.”
Take tonight’s outfit: jeans from Forever 21, shirt stolen from my sister about four years ago, boots from Walmart, and the purse is my dad’s 35-year-old camera bag. My jewelry is minimum and all three were gifts and I purchased the scarf at Forever 21 in Chicago. My outfit is inexpensive but cute and comfortable. More importantly, it’s me.
I understand how important your appearance can be and what it can tell people about you. I feel as though each day I get a little more comfortable in my own skin, I put a little more effort into choosing my outfits, I think about what my clothes will stay about me. Although I love brand names they’re not really me, plus I can’t justify breaking the bank for a new pair of jeans. By the same token, I can feel my style changing, I notice when I’m pulling something out of my closet that I haven’t worn in years or buying something I probably wouldn’t have chosen even a year ago.
I can see that I’m changing and I feel more confident in the clothes that I wear. All of these changes are going a little bit deeper though, a little below the surface. I’m not sure if I’m finally accepting who I am or if I’m really changing but I speak differently, I think differently, I write differently, and I don’t get offended as easily. I have never felt this…well… great about who I am, who I’m becoming. I’m slowly becoming less afraid, I’m slowly taking chances, I’m slowly accepting my mistakes, and I’m not ashamed to make some new ones. It’s not just the clothes or the conscious effort I’m putting into it, it’s everything and everyone around me as well. It’s the fact that I’m growing up and that I’m starting to understand what I want out of life and who I want to be apart of it.
I never knew how good it would feel to finally become Myself.