Quite honestly, 2015 has been the most difficult and hectic year of my life. Change came at me from every direction simultaneously slapping me in the face and rubbing my back. Below are my most “liked” Instagram moments of the year and although I wrote about many more of them in my diary, I can understand why these were most-liked. These nine moments captured by various filters represent the biggest changes I faced, both happy and sad.
The day we got engaged; a surprise to say the least
My birthday tattoo; a reminder to keep writing, fighting, and trying
Outfit from my birthday weekend in the city; the most confident I’ve felt in a while
The birth of my niece; my heart grew 6 sizes that day
My last day working at Caruso Gourmet Pizza; the start of a new office job
Our seven-year anniversary; and several wishes for the future
Christmas Eve with my siblings; we like each other sometimes
Walking to the hospital food court with my niece; where most of my October was spent
The day I found my wedding dress; I felt like a Princess
In 2014 I wished for 2015 to be a year of clarity and man did I get what I asked for. It became painstakingly clear that nothing is more important than family. That life is fragile and nothing is permanent, so to what makes you happy is the only way to make a life worth living. It became clear that plans are wonderful but flexibility is the key to sanity.
Because of this I am not making resolutions for 2016 – I don’t know what the year will bring but I am hoping for happiness, health, and adventure.
As I think back on 2014 I realize that I spent most of it in a hibernating kind of contemplation. I thought instead of doing. I questioned instead of acting. I was afraid and didn’t take enough risks.
My Year in Review
I changed my blog multiple times and am currently looking at new themes for the new year
I thought about giving up blogging altogether
I quit my job at the pizza place and gave a half-ass attempt to freelancing, then wound up serving pizza again
I went on multiple interviews and learned a lot from them
I applied to a million jobs (am still applying on a daily basis, HELP)
I got a part-time job at Oxford Learning Centre
I had many downtown adventures and attended a few amazing events
I took a short fiction writing class at Ryerson and adored it
I started writing short stories and began submitting them to literary magazines (I even entered CBC’s Short Story Contest)
I wrote a novella based loosely on my Uncle’s life for NaNoWriMo
I started writing for Passion8 Mag, which has helped harness my creativity
I started cooking
I TURNED 25
I met and spoke with inspiring women thanks to Ten Thousand Coffees
I read 61 books and loved most of them
I spent loads of time with my family, my niece, my in-laws, and my friends — they’ve been my happiness this year
My boyfriend and I have taken our relationship to the next level (more on that another time)
I thought a lot about privacy and social media and how it tends to make you lose sense of yourself
I decided to delete my Facebook account since I only use it to creep other people
The small steps I took in 2014 were on a winding road that led me back to the beginning more than once. It was the year of ONE-STEP-FORWARD-TWO-STEPS-BACK and I’m completely dizzy from losing my footing so many times. Some days I wasn’t quite sure who I was, nor where I was headed. If I wish for anything in 2015 it would have to be clarity. I just want to know what I’m supposed to be doing. I want to feel more like myself. I want to make something of myself!
Resolutions for 2015
BE PRESENT (Keep my phone in my purse.)
WRITE MORE POETRY AND SHORT STORIES (Who cares if no one reads them.)
FOCUS ON STARTING MY CAREER (Even if it what I’m doing isn’t part of the original plan.)
GET MY PRIVACY BACK (Social media is convenient, but privacy is unparalleled. I will share what I want, not what I think I have to.)
“For last year’s words belong to last year’s language
And next year’s words await another voice.
And to make an end is to make a beginning.”
― T.S. Eliot
Claire Morgan: And as you all can see, the ball has stopped half way to its perch. It’s suspended there to remind us before we pop the champagne and celebrate the new year, to stop, and reflect on the year that has gone by, to remember both our triumphs and our missteps, our promises made and broken, the times we opened ourselves up to great adventures… or closed ourselves down for fear of getting hurt, because that’s what new year’s all about , getting another chance, a chance to forgive. to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more, and to stop worrying about what if… and start embracing what will be. so when that ball drops at midnight, and it will drop, let’s remember to be nice to each other, kind to each other, and not just tonight but all year long.
It’s about that time of year, to start the long and hopeful list of New Year’s Resolutions. I posted my 2011 resolutions here and the only one I didn’t follow was learning to speak Italian. My 2012 resolution was slightly different – I decided to make a life change, one single resolution to follow my heart and my gut at all times. Reflecting on 2012 I’m happy to say that I’ve started to listen to my instincts, to do what makes me happy.
I refuse to NOT post my resolutions for 2013 so that I can’t back out of them – if it’s written, it must be done. SO here they are, my RESOLUTIONS FOR TWENTY-THIRTEEN.
completely overhaul My Pen, My Voice.;* – figure out exactly what I want this blog to be, how I want it to represent who I am, and how to keep it from becoming just like every other blog. I may need a bit of help when it comes to the design aspect 😛 (Any takers?)
write my second novel – the planning begins today
work and work hard to get my career started – get contributing blogger gigs, writing gigs, and (if all goes well) an internship OR full-time job (moving downtown if it becomes necessary)
go back to New York – with the family or the bf or my best friends and see all of the things I skimmed over last time
schedule less – or at very least not go completely berserk if plans don’t go the way that I want them to
enjoy more – find enjoyment in even the littlest of tasks, spend more time with people who make me happy, people and family member that I adore
open my mind – learn to be open-minded and not dismiss different food, adventures, or even styles that I haven’t yet tried
craft-it-up – all those things on Pinterest I wanted to try? In 2013 I will try some out
Anything else I should add? That’s a longer list than I anticipated but I’m ready to start checking things off!
“That looks like a long list, you better get on it.”
Last year around this time I blogged about my resolutions for Twenty-Eleven. I listed three resolutions, including learning how to speak Italian, writing or blogging every day, and spending more time with my brother. I am happy to report that two of those resolutions were actually kept – I still cannot speak Italian 😛
This year I’d like to try something a little different. Instead of making a resolution for Twenty-Twelve I’d like to make a life change. I’d like to do something that will affect me for years to come. Someone once told me that I need to learn how to listen to my gut – to let my instincts guide me. I don’t normally trust my gut, I ask questions, I analyze situations, and I make pros versus cons lists in order to come up with a balanced decision. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I actually followed my gut to make a decision.
I’m almost certain that Twenty-Twelve will force me to make a lot of decisions, from what to wear to whether or not I should go back to school (again). I would love to start listening to my gut to make such decisions. But what exactly is it saying? Can I even hear it anymore?
My instincts are either whispering, delayed, or have a mild to severe case of A.D.D because I can’t hear them.
Guts, instincts, conscience, if you’re listening…
Don’t be afraid to speak up in Twenty-Twelve and the years that follow.
I’d like to listen to what you have to say.
P.s I hope you all had a wonderful year, I wish you nothing but happiness, health, and love for the Twenty-Twelve. Have a safe and happy New Year’s Eve.